Why It Is Important to Spend Time Alone
The Art of Being Alone. Not all people can do it, but everyone should try at least once. Being alone releases unimagined reserves of strength in us, lets us get closer to our real selves and creates openings for new ideas of many types. Anyone who is self-sufficient, at least for a certain period of time, can look forward to a great gift that not everyone is given.
The reasons why we might prefer time alone to time spent with other people don't really matter. If you are not yet completely convinced of this idea, in this article we have summarized the three most important points for you as to why you should at least give being alone a chance now and then.
1. Self-discovery.
Don’t worry that you might not like yourself. Don't worry, you and yourself had formed an unbeatable team from the moment you were born. In everyday life, however, the connection gets lost, your needs, your interests and inclinations, and even your emotional life is often neglected when you are surrounded by other people.
How much time you need per day to find your way back to your center depends solely on you. For some people, an hour is enough to get them back on their feet. Still others need whole days on their imaginary island to find themselves again. The time and effort is always worth it. After all, you can always improve your inner strength, and sometimes it just needs a little extra care and attention.
2. Creativity.
Artistic artifacts from thousands of years ago, prove that we humans are creative beings. Dormant in every one of us is the talent and inclination to create music, fine arts, handicrafts, creative cooking, or other forms of expression. Unfortunately, the muse only kisses us when nobody's looking. So don't be surprised if your best ideas always come to you when you're alone—even if you are busy with the most mundane things.
3. Recharge your batteries for social interaction.
An evening spent socializing can be fun and liberating. We humans are social beings; very few of us prefer to go through life as loners. Nevertheless, it costs us a lot of strength and energy to listen to many people at the same time. To carefully follow one story after another, and to be surrounded by communicative individuals for a whole day or evening requires attention and focus.
Yet, whether professionally or privately, we simply cannot lead life as complete hermits these days. Meeting other people is inevitable. Unfortunately, we can't always choose the people we meet. And encounters with people stress us to some degree—both positively and negatively. A dose of time alone just before or after such intense periods of socializing can do wonders.
Our batteries are recharged, our minds can digest all the news in peace, and our empathy levels can settle back down to a normal level.
But why is it so difficult for some people to be alone?
Social lions, society ladies, homes always filled with guests—there are people who spend most of their lives exclusively in the company of others. From morning to night, their days are filled with people: even at night they find it difficult not to share a bed. There is quite a difference between sociability and the fear of solitude. The cause of fear of solitude is almost always one of the following three reasons:
1. You lack the practice.
Anyone who grew up among a colorful group of siblings and other playmates was certainly lucky. On the other hand, growing up in constant company is unfortunately also a guarantee that it will be very difficult for such a person to be alone and certainly more difficult for such a person to attempt to cultivate himself in solitude. Such people have no idea about how relaxing and invigorating a few hours' break from social life can be.
2. Your thoughts and feelings take over.
When we are alone, our perception makes room for everything that had been put on the back burner. Unpleasant, annoying thoughts arise that bring along unpleasant feelings. Social life distracts us from worries and allows us to live only in the moment. We have no time for past and future, philosophy and purpose, worry or regret—thank goodness for distraction!
3. You feel left out and unloved.
Being alone, like being single, is still stigmatized in the minds of many people as a sure sign of failure. The more friends you have on Facebook and in real life, the more popular and successful many people think you are.
But remember that when the dolce vita is over and illness or other crises brutally bring you back to reality, the so-called friends will be history and you will be forced to deal with reality and yourself for the first time. Remember the quote "Better alone than in bad company." If pays to ground yourself in reality.
When do you need more time for yourself?
Clear signs that you absolutely need quality time alone are, for example, when other people make you uncomfortable, when you are easily irritated and annoyed, when you find it difficult to concentrate, when you simply do not feel like being around others.
And how do you manage to reserve more time for yourself?
When family, roommates, partners, or friends and acquaintances constantly hang on you, as if their lives depended on you, you have to consciously draw boundaries for your own well-being. Plan your "me time" like any other appointment in your life. Also consciously choose a fixed time.
Think about what you want to do. Keep social media on mute during this time. Think of a place where you can really be alone. A walk is always possible. Communicate your desires clearly. Simply saying I need more time for myself sounds too selfish and at the same time sets off alarm bells—especially for partners.
Instead, express for example a desire to watch a movie alone, have a couple hours to read a good book, or just have the place to yourself for a morning. Be flexible; if scenario A is not possible, proceed with scenario B. But also accommodate others’ desires for time and space. Relationships are not one-way streets.
Today’s Conclusion:
Being alone and being lonely are two very different things. Many people still confuse being alone with loneliness. The latter can seek its home in a hall full of people. That condition is entirely different from the simple fact of being completely alone on a walk in the forest, where one is at peace with himself.
Relationships can be lonely when coldness, and distance, or perhaps even rejection and love lessness rule. Those who have never really found their place in the family and in a circle of friends will feel loneliness at every encounter.
On the other hand, many older people who live alone and pursue a wide range of interests and hobbies and maintain their memories, hardly ever feel lonely. They have learned to be alone, and more importantly, they have learned to appreciate it. That's it for today.