THIS Is What Happens When You Finally Start to Love Yourself!
Criticizing ourselves and constantly demanding too much from ourselves is scarily easy to do. Even back in our childhood we were already confronted with our supposed flaws and inadequacies. We were too thin, too fat, had red hair or glasses, were covered in freckles or were simply just different in some way.
This unflattering image we had of ourselves can often be fueled by parents and other authority figures that don't realize how deep those ideas can end up taking root in our minds and affecting our self-esteem. A joke in passing is usually enough and we start to believe all the nonsense that our young minds are bombarded with.
Classmates and teachers contribute to the fact that at some point we end up with an image of ourselves in our head that is then difficult to shake. All of that adds up over the years and what’s left is a very poor opinion of ourselves. We concentrate on the apparent countless shortcomings and spare no thought for our good qualities. Bad relationships and toxic partners are then the last straw.
This cycle explains why it's so unreasonably difficult for most adults to like themselves, never mind love themselves. It often takes years or decades for us to at least be happy with ourselves and accept our imperfections. There is unimaginable potential in self-love that has absolutely nothing to do with egos, narcissism or a warped perception of reality. In this article we want to show you why it's so important to love ourselves.
1. You take control of your life
The most important relationship in our life is the one we have with ourselves. If you have a good relationship with yourself, rule over yourself with mercy and love, nothing can throw you off course. Self-love is a very powerful backup when life starts throwing you curveballs. It’s both tragic yet reassuring in equal measure, because we’re ultimately going to end up alone anyway.
In reality, the only one who’s going to be there for you through every big decision, each one of your heart’s desires, and every tragedy, is you. This might be a tad depressing, especially for people that do whatever they can to ensure this isn’t the case. People who are constantly surrounded by friends and family don’t think that they’re alone. But in our darkest hours, and the most important times in our lives, that’s exactly what we are.
So, the sooner we start to work on learning to love ourselves and trying not to focus on what we think we’ve done wrong, the better. If you can make peace with yourself, then you’re ready to take on the world if you choose to. You and yourself will make an unstoppable team.
2. The time you spend alone will be so much more enjoyable
Anyone who gets on with themselves will soon discover the meaning of good company. It’s worth keeping the circle of people in our lives at a manageable level anyway, but if we love being in our own company then we rely on others a lot less for entertainment. Me time is a real treat. The only requirement is that we get to know ourselves better and better every day, and that we accept ourselves for the person we are.
And as we know, acceptance is the first step towards reconciliation. Over the years we learn that a lot of negativity was actually drummed into us by the outside world, and we start to question these things. At some point, we realize that all the negative opinions we had of ourselves were just a product of narrow-minded people that, out of envy and resentment, led us to have a poor self-image.
3. If you love yourself, you can love others
If you want to attract love into your life, you have to start with yourself. It’s not enough to outsource all of your feeling good, and all of your desires to another person. It’s also not going to work if we just expect others to love us when we’re not quite there yet ourselves.
Love is like a building. If you want stability and longevity, then you have to lay the foundations first and you can’t cut any corners. The foundation for love is the love we have for ourselves. For as long as you fail to do this crucial first step, it will be difficult, if not impossible, for you to experience that most beautiful of feelings. No other person can make up for what you lack in self-worth and self-love.
4. You’ll stop worrying about what other people think
The magic spell of self-love can work wonders in your life. One of the most overwhelming is probably that you’ll stop giving a monkey’s what other people think of you. When we put this into context, you can see just how much of a big deal we make out of it.
As long as we continue to doubt ourselves and how we look, other people will always have power over us. We’re then seeking validation from outside sources, craving praise and compliments. If we are our own biggest cheerleader, then we don’t need that kind of attention anymore.
5. You will be fine on your own
Self-love not only makes us strong and untouchable, it also makes us independent in the best sense of the word. As little as we now care about the opinions of others, well that’s exactly how much we’ll need their company or support. We will still want to be social beings, enjoying our surroundings and contact with others, but we won’t need it anymore.
Self-love is the best favor you can do yourself to improve your lot in life. If you believe you can conquer the world, then all you have to do is try. Just like any other endeavor, it will go your way.
6. You stick by your own needs
Self-love always goes hand in hand with a healthy smattering of egotism. We have to know who values us and where our needs are not being met. If you don’t value yourself highly enough, you might end up forsaking yourself in favor of pleasing others. Your own dreams then take a backseat. For people who think a lot of themselves, people who are their own top priority, it’s different. They wouldn’t let their own hopes fall by the wayside.
7. The feeling of security will make you stronger
No relationship in the world can make us feel so secure as the one we have with ourselves. If it’s stable and trusting, you can weather any storm. Get to know your capabilities, your strengths, and all of your good qualities. Temporarily put the less positive things to one side and see what’s left.
If you can find confidence in yourself, then nothing will be able to break your stride so easily anymore. Self-love guarantees security and protection. If we can rely on ourselves, every risk is halved, and every uncertain move will start off on the right foot.
Today’s conclusion: Trust yourself
Who’d have thought that self-love would have so many positive side effects? Independence, strength, the ability to love and learning to trust the world all come from this one little personal trait. Be like the Little Prince. Look at yourself with your heart, not with a critical eye and a preconceived notion. Or take an example from the adventurer and explorer, Wilhelm von Humboldt. He was convinced. You can do a lot if you dare to try.